Introduction

Do you stay awake and worry to yourself about the missed work when your sick? Did you get toys or games taken away when you had to miss school with a cold so that you wouldn't be distracted from rest? These things can actually make things worse or prolong your symptoms. By denying ourselves pleasures in response to lost productivity we fuel negative stress, which can compromise the immune system further.

Hans Seyle, The Father of Stress Study

As a young man in the early 20th Century, Hans Seyle entered medical school. While observing patients, he noticed a common theme: patients suffering from different diseases often exhibited identical signs and symptoms. They just "looked sick". This observation may have been the first step in his recognition of stress.¹ He would later call this kind of stress, distress. Our bodies use hormones and other methods in the body to try to cope with the distress being put on the physical body. It was such a unique concept that in many languages a word actually had to be created to describe it.²

Distress

Distress is what we most commonly call "stress". It's being "stressed out" or overwhelmed. It's the negative feelings we all get from time to time about a bad day at work, or a deadline, or even being late for an appointment. I won't take long to explain this, because I don't know a single person that has not felt the pain of this kind of stress. Distress can happen to us anytime, anywhere, for about any reason. That's because it all depends on how we view a situation. The great news is, no matter how distressing something is, if we look for it, we can almost always find an incredible opportunity.

Chris Gardner spent almost a whole year homeless and struggling to raise his toddler son. He had huge obstacles to overcome, but he also saw huge opportunity to live his dream as an entrepreneur. He worked hard to become a stock broker overcome the danger, finding the opportunity. In 2006, his story became a move starring Will Smith, The Pursuit of Happiness.

Eustress

We like to think of stress as two sides of a coin. For example, I hate roller coasters, and my husband loves them. If you could get me on a roller coaster with him, then take a picture of us at the crest of the hill as we begin decent, you would see sheer terror on my face (distress) and joy and laughter on his (eustress).

Eu- is the Greek prefix for good, so eustress is simply "good stress". Distress seems to come to adults quite naturally. We work hard, and we try to get ahead. We maximize our time, and we strive. We can get stressed (distressed) about the littlest of things. It seems that as we age, we engage in less and less eustress, unless we consciously work toward it. Robert Provine, PhD, a leading scientist in understanding laughter neuroscience said in an interview, "No one has actually counted how much people of different ages laugh, but young children probably laugh the most. At ages 5 and 6, we tend to see the most exuberant laughs. Adults laugh less than children, probably because they play less. And laughter is associated with play."³

What to Do About It

So what's an adult to do for eu? There are plenty of ways we can fit eustress into our lives! Tickle fights aren't just for kids! Neither are walks in the sunshine or moonlight, watching a funny movie, yoga, jogging, rollerblading, hugs and kisses, or any other activities that bring a smile to your face!

If you imagine that each person has a stress scale, a set of balances in their lives, the best thing to do is to be sure that the scale continuously tips toward eustress and away from distress. Take time to take care of yourself each day. Plan eustress activities.

Taking Care of Yourself

Eustress doesn't have to be an all day or several hour commitment. Think about how nice it feels to smile at someone, or to take one minute when working to stand tall and stretch. When you're able, take an hour or two (or even a whole weekend) to pamper yourself. The best way to care for those you love and move ahead in your life is to take care of yourself! Burned out people have nothing to give.